perspective

We take everything for granted. Those who have never had their life threatened, take life for granted. It's the nature of humans. Those who have struggled for money appreciate it when they earn it. Those who have starved will appreciate a meal more than others possibly could. I can tell you the fact that I don't see my son every day means that on the days I do see him, I am more keenly aware of how special my time with him is. I've learned to turn the radio off in the car to listen to him intently. I've learned to enjoy sitting and eating dinner with him. I've learned to play with him every day, even if I'm tired. I've learned to look in his eyes and tell him I love him.

Why is loss necessary for deeper appreciation? It's sad, really, that we take so many things and people for granted, that they'll always be there, that we can neglect relationships, that we have the nerve to build up expectations around what others should do for us.

A friend of mine is getting divorced, and only at the moment of realization that the marriage was ending did the significant other decide to kick it up a notch. Another friend of mine is losing a loved one to cancer. I don't believe there is any regret about the relationships, but it's a horrible, horrible reminder that we are so fragile, so temporary, so out of control of our fate...

I'm reminded of a professor from college who used to say that he lived his life in a way that if he knew he was going to die, he would be content. In other words, he lived every day as if it were a gift, doing exactly what he wanted to do with the people he wanted to do it with. I also remember, he and his wife never told each other "I love you." Instead they said, "I am here for you." I didn't understand the intensity of the love and commitment that comes with the latter statement until now.

If my life were to end tomorrow, what would I regret? What would I wish I had done?

Every day is a gift. Every moment in the precense of someone we love is a blessing. Every minute spent following your heart, your soul, and realizing the joy that is already in your life is a life worth living.